The Best Advice You Will Ever Read About Gaslighting
Ohhh, I get it. A contentious ex will often use gaslighting to get you upset and push your buttons. Some examples of gaslighting are when someone sensationalizes a benign event for maximum effect, twists the truth, says something and then pretends they never said it, uses your insecurities to make you feel bad about yourself, or flat out makes up lies and presents them as facts. This can be really frustrating because nobody likes to be falsly accused or misrepresented. Our first instinct when this happens is to defend ourselves. It may sound counterintuitive, but trying to defend yourself is the worst decision you can make in this situation. A lot of advice out there about responding to, and dealing with gaslighting is well meaning, but unrealistic and ineffective in real life situations. For example, telling the gaslighter that "this is hurtful, please stop" will do nothing to stop them. They know it is hurtful. That is why they are doing it. Below are some rea...