Amazing Mothers Without Custody

Many people have asked me what my parenting schedule looks like as a non-custodial parent, so here it is.  July represents a typical month for us.  Blue days are days the kids are with dad, and pink days they are with mom. Half blue/half pink are days that we switch. The AM switch usually happens at 9am or whenever school starts, and PM switch happens at 3pm, 4pm, or 6pm, depending on the kids schedule. Holidays and summer vacation (the time between school and camp) are split 50/50, alternate year to year and supercede regular visitation.  There are months where I get my kids for almost the entire month (like in August):  and there are months where I hardly see my kids (like in June): In a 28 day period, my schedule would be considered a 43/57 schedule. The residential custodial parent is the parent that the kids live with 51% of the time. This breakdown gives dad residential custody.  There are major perks for having 51% cust...

I'm a huge fan of the Grey Rock method, but sometimes you need to be direct and flat out say what behavior you would like to see be done differently. The method below works on children and ex-spouses who act like children. However, doing this is treading a thin line. If you don't choose your words carefully, you can make an already hostile person even more hostile. The key here is to criticize specific behavior, and not the person doing it. For example, instead of calling someone a jerk, or a narcissist, or a POS, say something like "don't speak to me in that tone of voice" or "don't call me that" or "I don't appreciate being threatened". Addressing the behavior directly will give them much less wiggle room if they're the type to gaslight you, or invalidate everything you say. Criticizes them personally (ie saying "you're such a jerk!") will also make them defensive,  and doesn't specify how you woul...